Time is going by so quickly!!
The family and myself had the charity night in aid of the hospice at the end of June, it was our way of celebrating the life of a wonderful man, my man....
We raised over £1,500 and at the end of this month a further £1,000 will be added to that total :) My niece (as was) was kind enough to sponsor our charity night through her work, Barclaycard, and they added this further amount. So in total it was £2,500 raised for Jon's beloved hospice! He would be so proud to know this.
I celebrated Jon's birthday with a family tea party, birthday cake and all......why shouldn't we celebrate? I miss him more as each day passes.....I have conversations with him in my head, this is easy because for the most part I know exactly what he would say, we knew each other that well.
My health hasn't been so good of late and I've had to have some unpleasant examinations done at the hospital, it's times like this that I SO miss his support. He was the only person who could truly calm me down and help me get things into perspective, I miss that.
My daughter, Donna has become my rock these days, but I feel bad that I have to rely on her.....she has such a lot in life to deal with. Moving in with her has been a blessing, though at the beginning I wasn't sure how it would be.....she is the best daughter in the world and I will never be able to thank her enough.
My mother is seriously ill at this time and the family has been told she will not be coming out of hospital this time round. I'm not sure how I will react when the time comes to say goodbye to my darling mum....it's too soon to go through this again! I can see similar things happening to her as her health diminishes, things I saw in Jon. I can't tell you how much this hurts....my mother has been unwell for a good while now, Dementia being one of the lesser problems she has. But during Jon's illness, from somewhere she managed to be there for me...she couldn't DO a lot, bless her, but her words meant so much at times when I needed her.
How do you say goodbye to the person who bore you and brought you into this world? I am back to looking at the calendar wondering which dreadful day will take her away from me.
November 7th 2014 took my life, my love, my everything away from me.
October 5th 1996 took my wonderful father away from me.
Now there is a date waiting to take another piece of my heart away, just, I don't know it yet.
So the calendar is not my friend (I'm sure others feel the same) it's just time marching on and taking happiness along with it.
On a brighter note (yes there are some!) my youngest son David announced his engagement to the lovely Sarah. That brought me so much happiness :D They are a lovely couple and deserve the very best of futures in front of them. So the planning starts here, I'm sure there will be a few tears along the way, as there always is in these things, but I'm sure it will be fine in the end. I am back to finding a hat! and an outfit, though I do have a little time to consider these things :) Brighter times are coming!
Tilly my beautiful greyhound is still my devoted friend, she loved Jon and now she is my little bit of him, that I still have. She joined the Taylor household along with me and gained a friend in Harriet dog. They love to play and annoy each other lol, she would be lost without Harriet now. They bring me great joy and comfort when I need it.....they make me laugh when they start their cartoon high jinx with each other.
So that is where I'm at in this month of August.
